I'm a great squatter.

 

This morning I’m heading off to tai chi, and for once I’m not even dreading it. This is progress. It isn’t that the moves are difficult (some of them are) or that I’m physically exhausted by it (sometimes I am) — no, those aren’t the things that compel me to sit in my car for 10 minutes rallying the courage to go in. It’s the fact that all of them have known each other for years, they have a vibe, a clique, a thing. They’re friendly enough, but they’re a tightly knit group and I’m still the new guy. Still under probation. 

All of this is in my head, of course. They've been nothing but gracious, helpful, friendly. Social anxiety sucks, y’all. Why am I like this? 

One cool thing happened last week. There’s this balance exercise where you place your nose against a wall, and also your hands outstretched and touching the wall, your knees and toes. Then you slowly lower in a squat, keeping all the touchpoints with the wall as you go. It’s not easy.

 Anyway, everyone took a turn and as the new guy I figured I’d at least be entertaining in my attempts. But an odd thing happened, I started the exercise and suddenly the room went quiet and then someone whistled and someone else said, “Wow!” and I realized I was almost in a full squat and was still touching the wall. 

Apparently I’m a savant at this one thing. Okay, fine, it’s not much but it’s something!